Today the Ottawa region need raise a glass of your favourite micro brew in honour of the birthday of Ottawa's best blogger, although mediocre podcaster, Graeme. Where would the Alfiesphere be without your cruel wit, objective insight, rationale thinking and terrible/repetitive use of the same photoshops that I think only crack a few of us up? It would be a sad state of affairs I'm afraid (picture a present day Alberte Belle working security on Springer and you get the idea). So, in honour of Graeme's birthday, here is a list of things we can all appreciate about his tireless and thankless (ie. free) work with the 6th Sens.
1. Foot odour does not get captured on the microphones at CKCU during podcasts that get a little too relaxed. I now sit in the other room, Francois is not always so fortunate.
2. One less Sens blog that reads like a box score, Google news feed or a middle schooler working out the kinks.
3. I can not recall a time he has ever championed the signing/drafting/trade of a former Ottawa 67.
4. Spends more time editing podcasts the night of recording than hockey players spend trolling the Kanata Centrum bar scene in a week. Yet watching him work the switchboard in studio is like watching an animal with hooves play Jenga.
5. One of the few people I know who actually believes in not swearing at a hockey game and instead opts to unleash a sailor's thesaurus during the post game show while stuck in traffic.
6. Never fails to come up with the perfect girl analogy (usually involving a haggard Valley/Vanier girl) to help us better understand the game of hockey as he understands it. However frightening that may be.
7. Is always willing to accept fault when I lose one of our long distance cards for phone interviews and pretend I never had it (Sorry you had to find out this way G).
8. While on a Greyhound bus and separated from our computers during the 2009 Entry Draft on route to Montreal for a bachelor party, Graeme proceeds to the front of the bus, grabs the mic and announces Ottawa's selection to the bus. The night was spent celebrating Cowen and not our dear friend.
9. Is willing to moderate arduous live blogs for hours on end so the readers can swing by for a bit, shoot the breeze and be on their way while Graeme spends hours ensuring they go well. While I provide excuses like this email I sent Nichols from last years deadline day: I was going to stay home today but realized the Sens were done and I'm not gonna sit around for 8 hours waiting for friggen rats ass Ray Whitney to get traded. So off to work I go. Check in with you later.
10. Only guy I know with a better collection of Sens memorabilia and SWAG than myself. When you move into your own basement one day Graeme, I assure you it will be well decorated.
As the Senators year winds down, another one begins for you but hopefully you don't get gutted, have your salary dumped and be left out of the big dance.
Happy Birthday. Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming - Jarmo blah bleeding heart blah apologist blah tank etc.