I drove back home from my girlfriend's place this morning and tuned into the local sports radio station to listen to some quality analysis by a former pro wrestler and a dwarf. Apparently I missed a whale of a game last night: Emery stunk, Chris Neil got hurt, the Sens looked soft and Emery must have crapped the bed. The Sens must have played a lousy game last night because the dwarf, who typically behaves like a beacon of optimism (the dwarf once defended the Martin Havlat for Tom Preissing and a bunch of AHL depth players, please note that I will recind this comment if the Sens steal someone with the 2nd round draft choice that we received) is ripping the Sens for a lack of effort. The wrestler is also in a foul mood, he is cutting off callers on a regular basis while muttering the words "Jared Boll, Adam Foote, go get 'em!" I thought I also heard him say that behind Alfie, Neil was the 2nd most important player on the Sens...I turn off the radio, any credibility that this program had is gone.

I could only watch bits and pieces of the game last night because my girlfriend's dad treated us to a few games of bowling for her birthday. There is something particularly endearing about bowling if you stop to embrace your surroundings. Not only are their underage teenagers drinking beer, there are also single, overweight, balding men who take the sport a little too seriously. I love these guys, they're all such characters. They all have their pre-shot routines in which they hold the ball with both hands out in front of them. Each of them taking deep breaths because they are one of two things: they are either intense or they are winded from the walk to the ball return.

Perhaps the only thing that can compare to the pre-shot routines is the post-strike or post-spare reaction: the fist pump followed by slapping high-fives with everyone at their table. Once they have finally sat down, they proceed to stuff their face with beer and nachos while systematically breaking down their throwing motion.

Fortunately I was able to catch bits of the game while got up to buy our foursome a pitcher of Keith's. With the game tied 1-1, I asked the bartender how they were looking, "The Sens? They look like shit, they're too soft man...they should be down 2-1 right now. Oh...and that's $17.50 for the pitcher." FACK! Talk about bearing bad news, the Sens are playing like shit and I nearly choked to death when I found out how much the beer was going to cost me. As I subconsciously fumbled through my wallet to pay the bartender, Meszaros buried a shot for a 2-1 Sens lead.

When I arrived back at my girlfriend's place, I checked the sports highlights to see that the Sens had lost in a shootout. This means one thing, make Gerber our closer and bring him into the game late in overtime for shootout purposes. Not only is he exceptional on breakaways, fans also want to root for this guy. Think of how loud and inspired the crowd would get while watching Emery get yanked prior to the start of a shootout. Give Gerber an entrance theme and watch the crowd respond, you could rally behind this guy. Hit me up with some Gerber theme suggestions in the comments thread.

Speaking of our goaltending woes, I can't help but wonder if Gerber is going to get the start next game. While Emery is susceptible to shots on the blocker side, I can't help but realize that Gerber is just susceptible to bad goals. With every Gerber start I worry that Emery is going to make like that back up punter for the University of Northern Colorado.

In college football, when you make a big play, teams will often reward players by sticking a sticker to their helmet. We should punish Wade in a similar fashion.